Many of my clients are less than thrilled to head into menopause. They’re afraid. Nervous. Angry. It is a rare soul that says, I can’t wait to go into menopause.
I didn’t really know what to expect, as my mom didn’t talk about it and those who did (whether personal or in media) were less than respectful to the “change”. We celebrate when girls become women — and yet swipe left when women become the crone.
I find this unfortunate but understandable in a world that glorifies youth and ignores death.
I was confused by menopause because I didn’t know what it entailed and read horror stories, mainly about unwanted physical changes. I might be a natural woman, but I am vain. I feel 30 — ageless, really — and will keep that vitality, no matter what the calendar says. So yah, menopause brought up a sense of curiosity and resistance. No one can stop the natural process of a body dying, so my resistance was a waste of energy. I began to focus more on the thrill of not having a period — and it is amazing.
I made lots of changes before menopause: no gluten/dairy, only decaf, traded sugar for monkfruit, no meat, cut down on the amount of food I ate, upped natural medicine, bought herbs/tinctures that have been here forever for women and released/was released from relationships that caused heartbreak and stress. I learned to love my amazing body — a truly wise and loyal friend — and listen closely to her needs. With these changes, the horror stories were just that — a genre I didn’t indulge. Instead, I read Dr. Christiane Northrup’s books on women’s bodies and found her approach as a OB/GYN refreshingly honest.
More than the physical, I was curious about the changes with my sensitivity and insight. The Crone in play. I’ve found that my psychic abilities increase to the extent I can trust them, and my trust has deepened. My creativity has also increased because I allow it to emerge in whatever form it wants. I’ve never been more powerful, sexy and self-assured – and life only gets better.
However, menopause is a deep and painful scraping of the past – and we can’t avoid it. Call it Chiron Return or a reckoning that needs to happen to be your fullest self — but it will happen. I’ve had to deal with deep traumas from childhood/teen years, religious indoctrination, fear and curiosity of death, the ways I hurt and was hurt by others, abandonment and lack of belonging in this world. To name a few.
There’s no tincture to ease that. It’s a deep dive and I just say, Let’s go. Clean it out. I want nothing to hold me back from the golden future I have ahead — because that pain has already been experienced and I won’t let it haunt me. When it arrives, I do my best to sit with it, rather than run away.
Menopause offers many gifts but it is the bridge we must cross to receive them. So, as a woman happily in the “change”, I’d say to not be afraid but have a sense of curiosity. You never know what will be revealed in this new era of power and self-expression.