How do I know what to say?

People are often curious to know how the cards work – and how I know what to say in session.

The cards are just 78 pieces of paper but they do help me tune into a stranger’s energy. Call them a colorful map of where they are now – and potentially headed. The skill of being able to know what to say is like any art: it takes years of practice, messing up and reflecting on what I can improve. With practice, I hone the ability to zoom in and not waste time with filler words or trite statements. Each reading makes me a better reader.

When I started nearly 20 years ago, I was a nervous wreck before every session. I feared being judged, blank out, say the “wrong” thing or be seen as a fraud. These are all common emotions from someone who approaches this work with integrity. As the years pass and you stay committed, it does gets easier. You grow more comfortable with the cards and realize you are not there to change/fix/heal someone. You are a guide that assists them with information and understanding. It is up to them to use it or not.

As for specific words — it really is hard to describe how I know what to say. I simply trust that I’m grounded and open enough to be with that person in the moment and say what they need to hear. I don’t change my voice or act weird (other than be my beautiful weird self) — I am very much Raven. However, I am “plugged in” during session and within a relaxed, conversational style, I relay what I see. I transmit the wisdom through jokes/metaphors/direct statements, depending on the client. I don’t worry about whether I’ve said enough or that I’ve done it right — that’s the gift of sticking with Tarot. I do the best I can, close up the reading and go back to my life.

Many of my clients have been with me for a decade or longer, so there is a comfortable vibe when we get together. The difference is that I’m more laid back and not as nervous (yes, I still feel a little sweaty with new clients). We can go deeper into the reading because there is an established trust.

I can always improve my practice so I remind myself to a) listen more and not jump in, though that is a tricky balance when the info starts to arrive b) not be arrogant because I’m very good at my work and have a successful practice. It would be easy for me to think I’m all that. 😂 Yet I am quite aware that my gifts are granted to help others and understand my experience on this planet. Confidence is one thing; arrogance is a train wreck waiting to happen. The good thing is that I don’t take life that seriously anymore, including myself — and if I do, I end up tripping over things! I am a total klutz and it keeps me humble.

When it comes down to being successful, I’ve always said that people want to be seen, heard and feel hope. It’s not so much about finding the perfect words — but meeting them with understanding, acceptance and love in a session.

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