The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation. What is called resignation is confirmed desperation.
― Henry David Thoreau, Civil Disobedience and Other Essays
If I had to pin down the majority of my clients, they are women at a crossroads. I’ve read for thousands of beautiful souls facing all kinds of shifts: marriage, divorce, big moves, exiting the corporate world to follow dreams of being an artist / healer / writer / entrepreneur / whathaveyou.
Their biggest fear?
If it’s a relationship and family, the kids.
If it’s their own dreams, money.
How will I make it? How will I pay my bills without a steady paycheck? What about health insurance? Retirement?
These are very valid, very real questions. Not everyone is cut out to run a business, as it takes an inordinate amount of chutzpah, patience and dedication — but everyone can be a dreamer. Life is meant to be lived, on your own terms. I’ve been accused of seeing life like one big “cherry pie” (I prefer pumpkin) — but these are the same questions I’ve faced. It’s not easy to find that particular freedom that makes the soul sing — but I guarantee that once you get a taste, you’ll never go back to a discontented life.
To even approach change with a willing heart is brave. Hugely courageous. Many will not shift from a life of “security” , no matter how often intuition taps at the window.
Nothing is a given in life except change. If you are the least bit sensitive, you constantly feel those shifting sands.
Yeah, that’s great to have intuition, Raven — but what about my bills? you may ask.
Bills are a fact of life — and if you’ve kept up and paid them, you’re not going to drop the ball now. I’m sure that responsibility muscle is well developed.
Money is important, yes — but it can’t be the driver here.
Do what you love. Do what makes your heart sing. And never do it for the money. Don’t go to work to make money; go to work to spread joy. Seek ye first the kingdom of Heaven, and the Masaratti will get here when it’s supposed to. — Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love
When I first started branching off into my own business about 6 years ago, all I did was stress money, even with well-paid tutoring gigs to help cover the rough spots. How will I pay rent/car payments — or ever have a vacation again?
Then I realized this was a long-term pattern I nurtured even with a steady teaching job in NYC. There was never enough, despite money in the bank. I was constantly stressing a future dip in numbers and never completely enjoyed the life right in front of me. I was “successful” in many respects: robust health, well-respected, living on the Upper East Side, new car, 401K, amazing health/dental insurance — but it was never enough.
I had far too much fear, and too little faith in my own resourcefulness. Yet that push to step into a joyful life — the one crafted with love — only persisted. Add the motivating number of “40″, and that’s when I knew I had to remove the shackles.
If you’re not getting happier as you get older, then you’re fuckin’ up — Ani DiFranco
There are plenty of books with advice on how to run a business, follow your dreams and attract abundance. You could spend the rest of your life reading them, and not actually jump into your own experience.
The simple fact? You’re not going to be handed a blueprint for what is not yet created. You’re not going to wrestle down all of the questions into submission. You’re not going to be able to track future money with microscopic precision, unless you’re independently wealthy (and even then: risk). You’re going to have plenty of times where you will worry and stress and wonder if anyone is going to take care of you.
That’s why it’s called stepping in faith — and why most go to the grave with the song still in them.
When you are committed to a life of integrity, respecting your visions, and listening with a open heart (despite the fear) — things have a way of falling into place with ease. You’ll see that once fear is balanced with a modicum of faith in yourself (and the Divine, if that works for you) — money/people/things show up. Bills are paid. Each time this happens, it’s a reminder that you’re on the “right” track and yes, this is what happens when you say yes. And if you forget, make a huge sign and plaster it to your office wall with all of the times your faith has been met with grace.
The best part? One day, you’ll wake up feeling free. And the next day, you’ll wake up feeling free. And the next and the next. Peace becomes a way of life, not a longed-for outcome. Your life is your own — and how many people can actually say that, even at 40, 50, 60?
How much is an hour of your life worth? A day? A month? 20 years? How do you want to feel — every day?
It’s possible. It’s real. It’s right in front of you.