“There is not something you’re supposed to do. There’s not something that you should do. There is only that which you are inspired to do. And how do you get inspired except by the contrast? It’s the life experience that gives you the idea of the desire, and then as you focus upon the desire, the Energy flows.” — Abraham-Hicks
I CALL MYSELF A MANIFESTOR but should probably change that to “contraster”. I create contrast for inspiration.
In other words, don’t go grocery shopping with me — because I spend an inordinate amount of time in front of the vegan cheese, organic coffee, granola…you get the picture.
But seriously — how boring if there were only one or two options?
Yet I’ve walked through this life, scared of making the wrong choice when faced with big life decisions — though if I bought a granola that wasn’t as tasty, I wouldn’t chastise myself. I’d just buy a better version next time. When it comes to choices like relationships or moving — there can be such fear around making the “wrong” choice.
I’m starting to believe that there is no wrong. Life is malleable and waiting for us to shape it. Sure, there are outside forces with other people and situations — but we have the power to change our lives. How? Use the contrast. Where is your life now — and where you like it to be? What experiences? Passions? Movement? Retreat? What needs to be left behind?
Once you make the choice, there will be times of doubt, fear, strength and insane joy. There will the low after the high, the questioning. I’m in the midst of my Oregon adventure but I’m not sure if I’ll stay here. Like the contraster I am, I just received a great offer in Vermont that would help me live the bi-coastal life I’ve long dreamed of. Should I return — and if I do, does that mean I made a mistake? If I stay, is Oregon the place? I don’t have the answers — just the contrast and desire — to live a rich and unusual life.
I think about what my new hippie friend advised: “Raven, enjoy the ride. It doesn’t matter.” She’s lived 71 years on this planet and knows a thing or two. Yet I still find myself adhering to some form of rigidity — that life should be lived this way. I moved here, so that means I should stay for a certain amount of time. Or I should stay on the West Coast because I hauled my ass out here.
In the moment, I’m enjoying Portland. There are many things to love here. Will I stay? Maybe. Do I have a great passion for the city? No — but the West Coast vibe is another story. There is much to explore and I’m eager to do so. I sorely miss my friends back East who are family — so that compels me to take another look at what my heart desires. I do so love to weigh options in my mind, whether it be granola or a cross-country journey.
The beautiful thing about this life? You get to choose. You get to change your mind. You get to turn around and take another road. It’s endless — if not slightly overwhelming — but what if there were no mistakes to be made? What then?